Thursday, June 12, 2008

The Great (Gross) Debate

Alright... this post is going to be unlike any before.

Not cute. Not funny. Not quirky. Not profound. And not deep. (Not even in the slightest).

I am simply in a very strange and disgusting debate with my husband. Which, really, is not all that unusual, since my husband is, in fact, very strange and disgusting. (Hey - this is nothing you all do not already know, okay? Do I need to remind you of the meatballs-in-the-floor-of-the-car incident???) :o)

Anyway, so here is our current very strange and disgusting debate...

So there we were...

Enjoying yet another incredibly delicious meal that was lovingly prepared by myself (and let's not forget that I started making this wonderful meal at ten o'clock in the morning, people).

Everyone is unusually quiet this evening. (obviously too busy hoarding the food and stuffing their cute little faces).

J sits across from me in the middle of the table. (we do this not to play footsie under the table. No, no. This is a purely strategic move. This way each of us can gain control of the children. You know, divide and conquer. Feel free to copy this ingenious maneuver).

All of a sudden, J starts speaking about a Creationist debate he has been following. It is actually very interesting, but I don't hear much after the first sentence, because a gigantic chunk of food comes flying out of his mouth and lands with a plop into the thick mass of his arm hair. (I know... just imagine how I felt having to see it happen!)

J doesn't seem to notice at all, and keeps talking. (which I find completely strange because the thing looked like it weighed at least a pound or so).

I finally have to interrupt him. (I just can't stand to look at it anymore!)

I point it out to him, expecting him to get his napkin and wipe it off.

No, no.

He picks it up with his bare hands and puts it back in his mouth!!!!!

Of course, I shriek with disgust!

J's response, of course, was, "What? It came from my mouth in the first place! How is it gross to put it back where it came from?"

He also said it was no different from me giving him his medicine after it fell on the floor.

Okay. I need to explain that one.

The other day, J asked me to get him one of his back pain pills. But when I grabbed them, the top of the bottle was not screwed on well enough and the whole bottle spilled all over the floor. These are prescription drugs. We do not have a job, let alone insurance right now. So we cannot replace them. So, I picked them all up, dusted them off, and put them back into the bottle, where I later gave him one (with his full knowledge of what had happened).

So now, my dear friends, I would like to know what you all think.

Is what I did with the pills any more disgusting than what J did with the chewed up ball of food? Or vise versa?

You decide.

Help us solve this Great (Gross) Debate!



jo Ellen said...

the ball of food definently more gross. Especiall since he di dnot notice.

Misty Burns said...

with jay...does it really matter? hahaha. just a typical day in the richardson household!!! hahahaha.

Bronie said...

"What? It came from my mouth in the first place! How is it gross to put it back where it came from?"

this excuse does not fly. sorry. no, it does not. lots of things "come from other places." that does not mean, however, that they are intended to return from which they came. just sayin'.